All I See Is Hope & Joy for My Future: Nathan Winterton
"I'm going after my dreams, I'm breaking barriers, and all I see is hope and joy for my future.”
NOTE: This story contains the individual's experiences with suicide and eating disorders and may be triggering to some.
Nathan is a kind soul who loves louder than most. He never holds back a compliment or an expression of love to his friends. He loves fashion, writing, and ballet, and spent the summer dancing with Ballet West. He has a bright future ahead and believes there is so much good out in the world to be experienced.
However, Nathan’s life hasn’t always been this full of light. Although he always knew he was gay, throughout his childhood he had the impression his sexuality was something to be ashamed of, so he quietly bore the weight of immense guilt. He tried to do what his faith expected of him, but eventually he couldn’t stand the pressure anymore. Last year he was at an incredibly low point and attempted to take his own life.
After he survived the attempt, he found clarity and realized nothing was worth suicide.
Since then he has been going after his dreams with a hunger that comes from knowing his own value and the preciousness of life.
"I realized that nothing's worth passing to the other side for. I realized that if God really loves me, he wouldn't want me to pass on for this, because he designed me this way and he doesn't make mistakes in my opinion.”
In order to heal and to help others on their journey, Nathan openly shares many of his life experiences through blogging, even the ones that aren’t pretty. He has been open about his suicide attempt, his battles with body dysmorphia, and his encounters with bullies.
He doesn’t let his setbacks define him, or keep him from living his life to the fullest, but he shares them in order to send a message those who may be going through the same things silently: YOU ARE NOT ALONE. And you are loved. Stay strong, because there is so much good out there to experience.
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If you need help, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) to speak to a trained crisis counselor.
